Why, oh why, did I say to the doctor that I didn't need signing off for another two weeks? Why did my parents not bring me up to be a malingerer?
The thought of going back to work tomorrow fills me with dread. It's like going back to school after the six week's holiday except I haven't been off galavanting and enjoying myself.
The stories I have heard in my absence, if shown on a TV soap opera, would push the bounds of reality. I'd be sat there screaming 'but things like that don't happen in schools'.
I've made my list. I've got my best suit and high heels ready. This girl means business.